Feeling gaslighted by OCD? Defeat OCD-related doubt through exposure and response prevention (ERP), not logic!
One of OCD’s most diabolical tricks is its ability to sow seeds of doubt, even about beliefs we hold strongly. Think of it as a tiny, annoying heckler in your brain whispering, “But what if…?” As we’ve discussed previously, OCD can create nearly instantaneous doubts about beliefs you’ve held firmly for years. If you have OCD, it’s not uncommon to suddenly question your sexual orientation, doubt your gender identity, or become terrified that you’re possessed or secretly worshiping the devil. You might fear that you’re a dangerous person prone to stabbing or murdering a loved one or an untrustworthy partner likely to cheat on your spouse. OCD can make you doubt your very intentions, convincing you that your actions are driven by evil or selfish motivations. You might even worry that you would intentionally hurt those you love most, such as harming your baby, molesting your child, or brutally killing your dog.
To someone without OCD, these ideas might sound far-fetched or unbelievable. However, if you do have OCD, you understand how it operates. OCD is a mastermind at making us doubt ourselves and our intentions. After all, very few things (if any) are truly impossible. OCD exploits the tiniest sliver of possibility, creating a whirlwind of fear, shame, and terror.
This leads to the conundrum of OCD: Even when you’re certain (or mostly certain) that OCD is barking up the wrong tree, it’s crucial to keep your wits about you. Remember that you can never defeat OCD through logic; it will inevitably find loopholes in your reasoning. Furthermore, the more you engage OCD in debate, the more likely you will fall prey to mental rituals that will undermine your recovery.
OCD won’t relent in response to your well-reasoned points; it will simply find ways to bulldoze through them and leverage them against you.
For non-OCD-related anxiety, logic-based cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) can be a useful tool. However, if your anxiety stems from OCD, attempts at logic are more likely to be weaponized against you, strengthening the OCD and making anxiety spikes more intense and long-lasting.
If not logic, then what?
Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP).
ERP helps you disengage from the struggle in a way that logic cannot. It’s a behavioral strategy that works indirectly, supporting you in reformulating your belief system based on what is rather than what if. It also helps you begin to trust yourself again. Yes, ERP can feel risky. It can even feel like you’re intentionally inviting disaster. However, a willingness to engage in ERP despite these fears is a calculated investment in yourself and a healthier future.
When we listen to OCD and perform actions based on fear (which is what rituals are), we reinforce the perception that OCD is right. Each compulsion reinforces OCD’s lies, making us believe we inhabit a reality defined by OCD’s rules.
In contrast, with each act of exposure or response prevention, we are behaviorally stating, “I’m truly scared right now, but I’m calling BS on OCD. I believe in myself and my future, despite the doubts in my head.” You’re not arguing with OCD; you’re choosing a life built on empowerment and trust rather than fear, refusing to get swept away in the OCD current.
Engage in exposure.
Do it frequently.
Do it courageously.
Questions? Comments? Feeling gaslighted by OCD? What strategies have helped you liberate yourself from OCD’s false reality? Sound off below…
